Potentially surprising things about someone who has lost 80 pounds and successfully kept it off without ever buying or subscribing to a diet program, food or book:
Back when I was younger, I knew there was an incredible amount of weight I had to lose. I was barely 5’4” and nearly 205 pounds. There was deep work to clear emotional eating and food/sugar addiction. I had this profound inner knowing that one day I was going to teach people how to get a body they felt good in, while also feeling true happiness, freedom and peace.
Here goes: I don’t make strict rules for myself. I have one rule: FOLLOW THAT SUPER-WISE INNER VOICE. If I had another rule it would be, “MAKE YOUR OWN RULES. AND CHANGE THEM OFTEN.”
It helps that by nature, I’m not a rule follower. Not in a “run the red lights” kind of way. (Actually, I don’t speed and I’m a careful driver. Because those kind of rules make sense and don’t cost you any money.)
Think about it. So many people, possibly including you, have tried popular (or non-popular) weight-loss methods and advice. Did it work? Did you give up and try another way? That didn’t work either? So after several rounds, you decide nothing works for you and something must be wrong with your body. It’s misleading.
Sometimes there is smart advice embedded in some of those programs. There are gems and pearls of wisdom within some coaching. Ultimately, though, you need to be your best guide. You’ve got to pull pieces of what is relevant and discard the rest. You need to be able to hear your inner voice and understand what your body is telling you. You need to understand the underlying issues of why you got to where you are.
I once heard a story of a well-known woman who published cookbooks and had a popular blog. She was internationally known for being a raw vegan for at least a decade. She’d used that diet to clear up many health issues and stuck with it for years. Then one day she started craving meat. The meat cravings went on for weeks, and then months. She felt horrified, guilty, and confused. She felt embarrassed as a leader within the “raw vegan” community that she finally gave in to eating meat. The point of this story is something she said, “The diet that heals you is not always the diet that sustains you.”
Sometimes I take a break from caffeine. Sometimes I take a break from gluten. Sometimes I take a break from meat. Sometimes I eat less. Sometimes I eat more. Sometimes, I limit my dairy intake. Sometimes I cut out all chocolate.
The newest change is going from lifting weights for 40 minutes/4-5 days a week to 2-3 days a week for 20 minutes. I’m increasing my dancing, yoga, walking and biking. I have plenty of muscle. Rock hard legs that I’m in love with. Sculpted arms that I love. I have no interest in building more muscle. These are all intuitively guided changes. Changes guided by love. I’m not afraid that my body will get soft. Actually, I know I’ll stay lean, but staying lean isn’t the most important thing in my life. Being connected to my body and soul is. When I listen to the wisdom of my body and soul, it’s always guided by love; never guided by fear.
I have a lot of big wishes and hopes for people everywhere; that you understand your body and what it wants; that you listen to that inner voice; that you stop “sshhhhh’ing your inner voice; that you re-claim your power without being controlled about it; that you begin to feel how you want to feel right now, and not when you reach a goal.
True joy and peace are unconditional feelings. You can have joy with an imperfect body. The only person really judging your body is you. You are a good enough soul as-is. You are worthy of your desires. You are deserving of what you want. You don’t have to look a certain way or have a certain body fat percentage to earn that life you’ve been waiting for.
Listen to those inner urgings to take care of yourself. Follow through on them. Trust them. They’re guiding you toward your greatest desires. The mind is a control-freak. The soul is wiser. Listen to your soul.