What do you have to give up to get what you REALLY want?
Let’s rephrase the question. Please note whether it sounds better.
What choices can you make to create a better life for yourself?
That sounds sooo much nicer, doesn’t it? It doesn’t even feel like the same question.
Every desire, including the desire to make a hard change, is accompanied by making different, more meaningful choices. I say ‘making meaningful choices’ rather than ‘sacrifice.’ Words are important. Sacrifice denotes negativity. Sacrifice implies emptiness, less, going without, not having as much, pain, and suffering. It implies kissing it goodbye, parting with it, resigning, and feeling a void. None of us are craving more of those negative feelings in our life.
What ultimately feels, and sounds, better is to use words that fill you with positive feelings. When you decide to make more a more meaningful choice, rather than sacrifice something, you feel like you’re getting something instead of giving something away. It’s more generous to yourself.
I’m a big fan of Danielle LaPorte’s Truthbombs. I discovered an old one of hers yesterday. It says, “If it feels like a sacrifice, reconsider.” To me, this means I either need to reframe my perspective, or reflect on whether the choice aligns with my values and genuine desires.
“If it feels like a sacrifice, reconsider” made me think of my complete lifestyle makeover. I cannot recall feeling like I sacrificed. I absolutely made different choices. Someone with a more negative perspective who looked at my life would say I sacrificed big time. I drank less. I chose to go for a walk rather than sit in front of the television. I made the choice to do strength training instead of traditional cardio. I chose to leave the ice cream in the grocery freezer section where it belongs. I chose to cook chicken, vegetables and sweet potatoes in my own kitchen, rather than buy take-out. I chose to put effort into my decisions rather than winging it. I chose putting effort into myself. I made these choices over and over and over again. I chose consistency. I chose dedication.
What I could have said was that I sacrificed drinks at the bar with my friends. I could’ve said that I sacrificed time in front of the computer. Or that I sacrificed feeling comfortable in my old routine, rather than to live outside my comfort zone in some way every week. I could’ve said that I sacrificed sugary treats, “one more drink,” or “having more fun.”
I’ll tell you what having more fun is — it’s going the extra mile for my health, prioritizing what energizes me, creating a fresh start, having pride in taking care of myself, and the feeling of inner peace from self-care. Priceless good vibes come from taking ownership of my life, feeling the power of positive choices, investing in myself, and nourishing myself. Loving myself.